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Chinese Weddings

Chinese weddings are often steeped in tradition. Thus, for Chinese wedding dresses, red is normally the traditional color and white is not recommended. The red color also applies to many Asian cultures. Red is preferred because it is central to most of their themes. From wedding favors, invitations to dresses, the color red always features prominently. From the decorations to the bride’s dress, red must be visible.

Chinese Wedding Dress

The traditional bridal dress is usually a one-piece frock referred to as Qi Pao, embroidered using elaborate silver and gold designs. Southern China brides normally wear a two-piece called Cheongsam or Qun Gua Kwa, which is also adorned, elaborately by golden dragon and phoenix. The dress is normally red in color because red is believed to be a strong good luck color keeping away evil spirits.

Traditionally, a red veil piece was part of the bride’s outfit for covering her face during the ceremony. Phoenix and dragon bridal dress designs symbolized the balance of female and male power. The bride is often seen with the red veil that covering her head and sometimes her face. Among the most prominent features in these weddings is the bridal gown. A majority of the brides wear up to six dresses in a single wedding night. Nothing matches the passion and charm of red Chinese wedding dresses in the ceremony.

Choosing a Chinese Wedding Dress

Choosing the wedding gown is a very important decision. The dress sets the tone of the entire ceremony and therefore the bride should feel special and comfortable in the gown. It is vital to ensure this while choosing the dress. Thus, one is advised to shop at a renowned designer to ensure authenticity. However, one should consider their budgets before making a purchase. With this, one should also consider alternate options for instance, renting the wedding gown.

Some prospective couples prefer a themed ceremony to complement their renaissance or medieval wedding dress. For them, nothing utters romance than traveling back in time. Whatever dresses a bride decides to allocate for their wedding, choosing a dress that exudes the beauty and aura of the bride in the best manner possible. A bride can choose a gown with traditional embellishments looking like a bell-shaped skirt with a modern fitting or lace made using satin and decorated with beautiful frills. Select long Chinese wedding dresses with mind-blowing decorations made of flower patterns. Some embroidery and beadwork can add up to the dress’s beauty.

The dresses are mostly presented with long low lines; choose cut sleeves to present one in a moderate way. Consider a large selection of marriage dresses that come in different materials, sizes and styles for a Chinese bridal gown. When ordering a gown, always give one’s right measurements. Give it arty to see if it fits and point out all shortcomings and correct them.

A wedding is a special moment therefore the wedding gown chosen must serve to exude this importance in the entire ceremony. Every bride should ensure that the attire chosen is comfortable so that she is at ease in all the activities of that special day.

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We have seen many Chinese singles online found their companion at free Chinese dating sites. Many single Chinese women have found their husbands on net. It is common to find Chinese girls for dating and marriage these days. This electronic world helps us a lot. We can find love and romance online these days. Chinese dating service is a means to find online Chinese single men and women locally and around the world. There are single Chinese girls seeking for partners in China. There are also Chinese women seeking for companion in other countries as well. Western men also find Chinese brides online at these free Chinese dating sites. So, I have some experiences about seeking for love online. It worked well. Some Chinese singles met with each other online and went for a marriage.

Online Chinese dating is a tool to find Chinese single men and women. If you are a single Chinese woman, then you will feel boring and lonely. Chinese singles should find their partners at online dating services. There are Chinese dating sites that provide the service for free. Members who can register for a profile, search for other singles, and interact with them without paying a fee. Some services charge members a small contacting fee when members try to send a message to others. Anyway, free or paid Chinese dating sites have one purpose, that is, they try to help online Chinese singles to find their dream mates. We have seen too many divorces happened in recent years so there are even more Chinese single people. Chinese singles should not be single because there are many dating sites that offer the means to find their partners online. Looking for love or dates on net is easier than you order an item online.

When you take a look at the online Chinese dating service interface, you know you can register a profile for less than 5 minutes. Single Chinese women and men should join these online dating websites to find their companions. Why being single where there are couples out there just have met each other through these Chinese dating sites. You should not be single at all. We live in this modern day, single Chinese men can meet Chinese single women online, easily and conveniently. Some of these sites offer totally free Chinese dating service for Chinese singles to seek online dates. The first step to do that is to create a personal ad with your photos to attract other Chinese singles. The 2nd step is to search for all singles at these free Chinese dating sites you like. The 3rd step is to contact them all. Then, you need to wait and reply to whoever contacting you. After you exchange with some members that you really like, then you can make an appointment to meet face-to-face.

Chinese single women and men will contact each other if they like one of another. After this meeting, you use a common sense to go next. It is all up to you whether to continue meeting this Chinese woman or man. Looking for Chinese singles online is simple. There are many free Chinese dating sites that offer the means to find your soul mate on net. Your future dream mate is waiting for you online. Joining these free Chinese dating websites is the first step to find single Chinese men and women. Seeking Chinese women and men for dating and marriage at a Chinese dating service is common these days.

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There are basically two types of scams when it comes to mail order brides. The first one involves the internet-dating site itself, or the marriage agency, or whatever term they use to describe themselves. Some of these sites are out to get as many men to pay for memberships as possible and then disappear into cyberspace with all the money.

Agency/Website Scams

Many of the women who are listed with these sites will have no idea what the site owner is really up to and are completely innocent of any wrongdoing. On the other hand, these sites often use women who don’t even exist, or who aren’t foreign at all, or who have no idea their picture is on a dating site.

The way to protect yourself against sites like this is to do some research before you decide to sign up with a particular site. Look for reviews, visit forums, and see if you discover other people who have encountered problems with the site in the past.

Other steps you can take include:

• Looking for sites that require a photograph. Without a photo, you have no idea who you might be dealing with. And be leery of pictures in suggestive poses or those wearing provocative clothing. Those are the ones most likely to be trying to get your attention for the wrong reasons.

• Staying away from huge sites with tens of thousands of women, as well as tiny sites with less than 500. You’ll almost always be better off at a mid-size site with 2,000-4,000 hopeful women.

• Find out what ‘extra’ services the agency is charging you for. Your best bet is with a site that charges a flat monthly fee.

• Be sure the profile pictures look like ‘real’ women and be suspicious of a site where all the women are drop-dead gorgeous ‘model’ types.

• Do some research to see if the site has had complaints from previous members.

Individual Scams

The other type of scam you could run into is from the supposed mail order bride herself. Unfortunately, you’re probably more likely to experience this type of scam than the first one. It tends to happen more often on large dating sites, because they’re able to blend in better, and because a large site gives them even more men to target.

The way to protect yourself against this type of scam is to know what to look for so you can recognize when it happens. Now, you should know that the majority of women who are on these international dating sites, or mail order bride sites, are genuinely seeking a marriage minded man and have no intention of scamming them or taking advantage of them in any way.

It’s the few who do that you must guard against.

Once you learn what to look for, it makes it much easier to spot these women who want nothing more from you than the money you’re willing to part with. Generally, they show their hand early in the relationship, but some scammers can be very patient, sometimes waiting several months before they play their hand. They’ve heard the rumors that all Americans are rich, and they just want to find some unsuspecting man who’s willing to share his ‘wealth’.

They know that while $50, $75, or $100 may not be a huge amount to you, for her it may be the equivalent to a week’s pay or more.With the average monthly salary in Russia roughly $640, she only has to find about 10 men willing to give her money to make that much, or even more.

The best advice: Don’t send any money for any reason.

Here are just a few of the ways she may try to make you sympathetic enough to send her money.

1. She tell you she wants to meet you but needs money for airline tickets, a travel visa and/or travel expenses. This is a classic scam that many men have been taken in by.

2. She’ll send you an email saying she can’t pay for translation and ask you to pay for it.

3. You’ll try to buy airline tickets, either for yourself or for her, from a travel agency she recommends and you don’t realize it’s a fake agency.

4. She’s had an accident and needs money – to pay for car repairs, hospital bills, expenses while she’s out of work, etc.

5. She’s lost her job, had to quit school, mother needs an operation…the list and the creativity goes on and on.

The bottom line is, to protect yourself from being scammed, do proper research on a site before you choose one, and don’t send money to a prospective bride for any reason.

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If there is anything at all Africa is in need of, it is nothing but cultural education of life. The financial demands of traditional marriages and funeral ceremonies in this part of the world have completely brought many individuals and families to down to their knees, ruination and even sent them to early graves courtesy of stroke or high blood-pressure; still we are far from learning great lessons maybe because we have become inured to learning our lessons in hard ways.

Consummations of traditional marriages and funeral ceremonies constantly occur anywhere in the world but what follows upon occurrences in Africa is a situation which if not well managed could also lead to the death of newly-weds or deceased families as the case maybe. This write-up is particularly concerned about traditional marriages in Africa especially in the Nigerian society and the greedy roles played by such families.

Many traditional weddings in Africa have after the ceremonies welcomed poverties and disheartening images in the homes of the newly-weds. This can be   particularly blamed on the family of the bride because they always want everything from grooms, a situation like this may also be blamed on the couple, who for what the people of the world may assume them, overstretch their spending by accepting loans, borrowing and even disposing-off valuable possessions just to meet up with marriage demands. It is therefore not uncommon to find couple begging for foods two weeks after holding their marriage.

The aftermaths of extravagance, unnecessary grand and colourful activities that are tied to marriages often leave couples in chains, abandonment and in sorrow. I shall try to explain how families of brides in many part of Africa sale their daughters thus making life meaningless for them.

In our African society, many cultures require that a bride-price be paid before a man can marry a woman but the idea of payment of this bride-price has been mismanaged, and grotesquely distorted to means of one-day generation of money for the family of the bride. Our families in Africa have become materialistic only wondering how much more they could making marrying –off their daughters to supposedly wealthy individuals in the society. These families want to keep eating continuously from dowries and bride-price of their daughters.

A situation whereby dowries and pride-price are negotiated should be discouraged because humans are no goods and the days of slavery are past. Interestingly, it is customary for the family of the bride and groom in some part of Africa to employ the middlemen who negotiate and bargain on the price of bride-price to be paid. The same method our fore-fathers who acted as middlemen captured and negotiated away their children who were sold to Europeans slave traders. Many a marriage has been brought to an abrupt end because the representatives of families who went on negotiation would either not agree on any particular sum or the groom could simply not afford the sum levied on his wife to be. This is disgustingly terrible.

The implication of the developments pointed out here is that many unmarried cohabit and bear children which in Nigeria we call “Lagos marriage.” Sometimes cohabiting may be considered immoral in the society but the act has with financial convenience enabled many of such victims to achieve their aims because when the groom comes knocking at the of his in-laws for marriage, he is sometimes leniency maybe accorded him because of the belief that he may after all abandon their daughter.

This greed in families has also led to the bankruptcy of newly-weds and brought about elopements too, and such daughters are never to be seen again until he returns with pregnancy which her clever man may deny. An ugly situation created by this may also be seen in the availability of adult-singles who litter around African streets, many of these singles have availed themselves of the opportunities to defraud true marriage seekers online especially Americans and Europeans thus further discrediting the image of the continent.

Although, marriage negotiation remains the affair of families involved but greed for high bride-price should be checked and discouraged by governments if this social problem is to be effectively put under check and ugly consequences often leading to large number of divorces in our court should be reduced. In this way, jostling for large share of money from bride-price among family members and elders of villages should be discouraged. We may sometimes expect reasonable family members to accept half of bride-price and return the rest of it to the groom because the money will be used to take care of their daughter, and this way their daughter will be have a happy home. We have also observed some families heads who in the course of marriage negotiations state that they would accept anything given to them.

Unfortunately, many churches in Africa today have encouraged large spending and affluence in the organization of Christian marriages between their members, and many of these churches are still in existence today. It is also stands to reason to understand that two of the Christian denominations who have stood out, not being carried away by unreasonable demands are Deeper Life Bible Church and Jehovah’s Witnesses. Anyone of you who have had the opportunities to attend weddings organized by these denominations will readily agree that much time and affluence are not exhibited in these churches.

We want to call on the Nigerian Government to curtail the greed occasioned by bride-price by enacting and enforcing a law as we have seen in a tiny West African State of Togo which states that “bride-price can be paid in kind or in cash or in both ways”     

The law adds: “In no case should the amount exceed the sum of 10,000 F CFA (US$20.00).” (Negotiating a Reasonable Bride-Price, www. Watchtower.org)

Our Government of Nigeria should also realize that it owes its subjects social responsibilities, and operating this will make our society a good for all and finally reduce corruption and desperation among the youths of the country. After all marriage can be a free gift from God, and most youths who plunder the society, engage in robberies, assassinations and other forms of nefarious activities do so to favour women.

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Over the last five years as a paranormal investigator I have attempted to answer many questions dealing with the paranormal. I certainly do not consider myself an expert by any means.

Since some of these questions have dealt with areas in which I feel I have some competence–cognitive psychology, mental illness, brain disorders, vision–I feel that I have been able to adequately address them. If I don’t feel that I have the background necessary to answer a specific question, I will refer the individual to people who do.

There is one question that has been repeatedly asked which I found surprising. I would say, the majority–but not all–of the people that have asked me this question have been teenagers.

The question is always some variation of…

“I’ve decided that I want to be a ghost hunter, you know for a job. I’ve very certain about this, do you know how I do this?”

Even with my relatively limited knowledge, I was willing to tackle this question.

I can only assume that the recent popularity of such shows as Ghost Hunters, Most Haunted, Paranormal State, and others has lead to the belief–at least in the people asking the question–that being a paranormal investigator is a legitimate career path.

So, I tell them with no uncertainty, that Ghost Hunting is probably NOT a viable career choice.

I believe that the popularity of this field touches on the basis of human existence…consider the question being asked; Is there an afterlife? Of course everyone is interested. But, lets take a step back and consider the draw as a career.

You get to travel, you get to go into cool places, it appears to be a relatively easy activity that is accessible to everyone, and you may get to be on television and become famous! There are some basic human needs being met here, and being thought of as cool because of your job is something we all could live with. Who doesn’t want recognition and to be looked up to by their peers?

So, we find ourselves easily understanding some of the motivations for seeking a career as a ghost hunter: Prestige, recognition, possible fame, working toward finding the answer of one of the most important questions of life and death.

But…

Realize that some of the most respected people in the field have been doing this for years, and most of don’t have their own television show or perhaps make a significant amount of money doing it. People labor for years to gain a level of expertise in a subject matter. Sudden stars like Jason and Grant of TAPs have been conducting paranormal investigations for years, yet, their primary careers are (or were) as plumbers.

The people whom I consider the most respected and well-known paranormal investigators are individuals like Troy Taylor, Jon Zaffis, and Lloyd Auerbach. I am not conversant on the educational and career backgrounds of these individuals, but I do believe that they are able to make somewhat of a living working in the paranormal field. None of them have a famous TV show, but all are accomplished authors, lecturers, and teachers willing to share their knowledge. Mr. Taylor–with the well-known mid-western sensibility to tell it like it is–specifically says that he eschews celebrity, having chosen

not to go that way long ago.

In my eyes, these folks are the giants, without which shows like Ghost Hunters would not exist.

Now we come to money. How does one earn money being a paranormal investigator?

While some investigators charge for their services, I would say that most do not. Groups often accept donations, even going as far as to set up a Paypal account on their Web site (which I consider particularly tacky by the way). Our group accepts donations, and though we’ve received a few, they certainly haven’t covered our expenses.

So, where does that leave us?

People that are making money in this field are authors, run tour groups and give conferences, teach classes, and, perhaps, earn money from Web site advertising or selling ghost hunting equipment. Some also may offer paranormal marketing for businesses–something we provide for free. The rarest are the very small percentage of people who have a television show and/or act as consultants to the entertainment industry.

At least as far as I can tell.

I should note that I have been contacted by three different television producers over the last 5 years (via e-mail ) looking for people to audition for new paranormal-based television shows. Pretty cool, but I’m not an accomplished or well-known investigator, so I would hazard that I was one of 1000′s of people that they contacted. Sure, they may have liked my amateurish web site, and perhaps saw my picture, but I assume that these opportunities are very rare.

Visit the International Ghost Hunters Society (Dave and Sharon Oester) at www.ghostweb.com or Mass Paranormal at www.massparanormal.net if you want examples of people that are probably able to finance their time spent doing paranormal investigations via their activities. I respect both these groups, and their Web sites are certainly worth a look.

There are many ways to earn money, but you don’t do it being an investigator, you generally have to do it by one of the ways I’ve mentioned in the previous paragraph.

So, where does that leave you for a career as a ghost hunter?

I advise people that ghost hunting is a hobby. If you can find a way to earn enough revenue to finance your hobby through donations, you are a successful ghost hunter. If you can build a popular paranormal web site and earn money through advertising and selling products on line, you are a successful ghost hunter. If you can earn revenue from teaching a workshop, you are a successful ghost hunter.

But, you better pick something else for a stable long-term career.

If you are very, very serious about the pursuit of the paranormal, there is an actual career path for you as a psychologist. You would need to start by earning your bachelors degree in psychology, they pursue a graduate degree (doctorate) in parapsychology and then, probably get a job teaching at a university. Technically, its not a career as a ghost hunter, but you’ll more then likely make enough money to finance your investigations. Ghost hunting won’t be a job, it would still be a hobby–like it is for me and the other 99% of ghost hunters out there. Of course, you’ll be extremely qualified to actually conduct investigations.

So, for all of you career track ghost hunters out there, good luck!

Does anyone have any other ideas? I’d sure like to make enough money ghost hunting to pay my mortgage.

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